Keys

Last night I was thinking about a time when I was very young and wondering if what I remember is real or just what I've heard growing up. It seems that when I was very young, maybe one or two years old, my father left me alone in the car while he was throwing out or picking up something from the very back of our yard.. While he was gone, which must have been just a few minutes, the key to the car disappeared.  Of course, I was the only person around, so my father figured I had taken it and dropped it somewhere. After asking me and then checking the car, I guess he gave up. That's the part I can't remember.

What I can remember or think I remember, is sitting in the car with the key in my hand and trying to find the place where it was supposed to go, before my father came back and found me with the key. I finally saw these openings right in front of me on the dashboard, and when I put the key in one, it disappeared. When my father came back, I couldn't tell him what had happened, but I seem to remember trying to point to the opening. I was so frightened at what I had done, that I can't remember what happened after that. I'm sure my father was angry, and even if his anger was directed at me or not, I was still afraid of his loud voice.

Whenever I heard this story as I got older, my father and the others would be laughing so I think he must have eventually found the key. However, even to this day I've never been able to get past angry voices directed at me, and the feeling of helplessness which they cause.